Learning From Literature

The Road Back To You by Ian Morgan Cron & Suzanne Stabile

Cover of The Road To You by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile

The Road Back To You: An Enneagram Journey To Self Discovery by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile is a self-help book published in 2016.

The Enneagram serves as a navigational tool with a map of nine distinct personality types, leading to a better understanding of one’s true self. By gaining insight into your tendencies, desires, fears, and more, individuals are empowered to make informed decisions about their future. In addition, you can better understand how to connect with loved ones and the underlying motivations that drives their actions. 

For each of the nine personality types, Cron provides an in-depth exploration, including descriptions such as the associated deadly sin, childhood behaviors, relational dynamics, professional interactions, wings (defined below), messages for spiritual transformation, and ten actionable tips for personal growth. The narrative is enriched with applicable quotes, statements, notable figures, and humorous tales for each “number”.

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Enjoy!

Table of Contents

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Basis Of The Enneagram
  • There are 9 different personality styles – we naturally adopt one in childhood
    • Referred to as your “type” or “number”
    • Infinite expressions of each number; not all of the same type acts the same
    • None are better or worse (all have unique assets / liabilities)
    • None are gender-based
  • Each has a distinct way of seeing the world & an underlying motivation → influencing how that person thinks, feels, and behaves
  • Each is additionally influenced by your wing and stress / security personality
    • Secondary influences that complement your core personality, adding nuance your character
  • Wing → one of the two adjacent personality types
    • You pick up some characteristic traits of your more dominant wing
    • A Type 4 Personality + Type 3 Wing is slightly more outgoing and willing to perform for recognition
  • Stress → number your personality moves towards when feeling stressed
    • Arrow pointing away from your number
    • Type 7 takes on negative qualities of Type 1 – less easy-going, more black-white thinking, etc
  • Security → number your personality moves towards when feeling secure
    • Arrow pointing towards your number
    • Type 7 takes on positive qualities of Type 5 – let go of the need for excess and appreciate what you have
The Personality Types
Note: Names for each personality type can vary depending on the source, but they all mean the same!
  • TYPE 1: The Perfectionist
    • Ethical, dedicated, reliable
    • Motivated by a desire to live the right way & improve the world
    • Avoid fault
  • TYPE 2: The Helper
    • Warm, caring, giving
    • Motivated by a need to be loved and needed
    • Avoid acknowledging their own needs
  • TYPE 3: The Performer
    • Success-oriented, image-conscious, wired for productivity
    • Motivated by a need to be (or appear) successful
    • Avoid failure
  • TYPE 4: The Romantic
    • Creative, sensitive, moody
    • Motivated by a need to be understood & experience their oversized feelings
    • Avoid being ordinary
  • TYPE 5: The Investigator
    • Analytical, detached, private
    • Motivated by a need to gain knowledge & conserve energy
    • Avoid reliance
  • TYPE 6: The Loyalist
    • Committed, practical, witty
    • Worst-case-scenario thinkers motivated by a need for security
  • TYPE 7: The Enthusiast
    • Fun, spontaneous, adventurous
    • Motivated by a need to be happy & plan stimulating experiences
    • Avoid pain
  • TYPE 8: The Challenger
    • Commanding, intense, confrontational
    • Motivated by a need to be strong
    • Avoid feeling weak / vulnerable
  • TYPE 9: The Peacemaker
    • Pleasant, laid back, accommodating
    • Motivated by a need to keep peace & merge with others
    • Avoid conflict
The Triads
  • The 9 personalities are divided into 3 triads
    • Each is driven by an emotion related to a part of the body
    • Another way of describing how you take in, process, and respond to life
  • Anger / Gut Triad (8, 9, 1)
    • Driven by anger → 8 externalizes it, 9 forgets it, 1 internalizes it
    • Relate to life instinctually (at the gut level)
    • Tendency to be honest and direct
  • Feeling / Heart Triad (2, 3, 4)
    • Driven by feelings → 2 focuses on others’, 3 has trouble recognizing feelings, 4 concentrates on their own
    • Relate to life from the heart
    • More image-conscious than other numbers
  • Fear / Head Triad (5, 6, 7)
    • Driven by fear → 5 externalizes it, 6 internalizes it, 7 forgets it
    • Relate to life through the mind
    • Tend to think / plan before acting
Deadly Sins
  • ONES → Anger
    • Compulsive need to perfect the world
    • Aware no one (including themselves) can live to their impossibly high standards
    • Experience anger as smoldering resentment
  • TWOS → Pride
    • Direct all energy toward meeting the needs of others while ignoring their own
    • Secret belief that they alone know what’s best for others & are indispensable
  • THREES → Deceit
    • Value appearance over substance
    • Project a false, crowd-pleasing image, buying their performance
    • Deceive themselves into believing they are their persona
  • FOURS → Envy
    • Believe they are missing something essential without which they will never be complete
    • Envy what they perceive to be the wholeness & happiness of others
  • FIVES → Avarice
    • Hoard things they believe will ensure they can live an independent, self-sustaining existence
    • Ultimately leads to holding back love & affection from others
  • SIXES → Fear
    • Forever imagining worst-case scenarios & questioning ability to handle
    • Can lead to belief systems (& sometimes authority figures) to provide the support and security they yearn for
  • SEVENS → Gluttony
    • To avoid painful feelings, they gorge themselves on experiences & adventures
    • Never satisfied, the pursuit of these distractions escalates
  • EIGHTS → Lust
    • Lust after intensity; they are excessive in every facet of life
    • Domineering and confrontational, they present a hard, intimidating exterior to mask vulnerability
  • NINES → Sloth
    • Refers to spiritual laziness (not physical)
    • Fall asleep to their own priorities, personal development, & responsibility for becoming their own person
Note

This post provides a glimpse into the Enneagram’s nine types and its functioning, but for the full transformative potential, acquiring the book is essential. The remarkably accurate descriptions and profound insights offered by the author enables a deeper self-understanding, guiding you toward meaningful actions for self-improvement and a better life.

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