Negotiation 9
- Label the underlying emotion, with “it seems like…”
- Mirror key words, upward for elaboration and downward for understanding
- Silence after a technique, giving space to respond
- Paraphrase what they said in your own words
- Summarize so far, ending with a label to align understanding or reset convo
- Calibrated questions to guide the other person to think and explain
- “I” to set boundaries: “When you do X, I feel Y because Z.”
- Encourage with small signals like “mhm,” nodding, or “I see”
- Rule of Three requires three separate agreements to confirm commitment
Laws of Negotiation
- Fear of loss is the driver of decision-making
- Your voice alone triggers emotional reactions
- Labeling strengthens positives and diffuses negatives
- The urge to correct is irresistible
- Last impression is the lasting impression
- Vision drives decision
- There’s a team of deal killers
Basics
- Humanize yourself
- Don’t move too fast
- Negotiation is not a battle
- Being right isn’t the key to success
- Treat them how they want to be treated
- Disagree without being disagreeable
- Word your questions to elicit a “no”
- Make words, tone, and body language align
- Find black swans with face time, unguarded moments, and mislabels
One-Sheet Preparation
- Write the best case scenario
- Summarize: why are you there? why them? what do they want? why?
- Make an accusation audit (a preemptive label)
- Create 3-5 labels
- Prepare 3-5 calibrated questions
- List noncash items that would make you want to do it for almost free